Canceling a wedding invitation: How do I avoid hurting the newlyweds?
The Marriage is for many couples the happiest day of her life. Of course you want to have your loved ones around you to celebrate the occasion properly. After all, ideally you still remember the ceremony and the one that followed Celebration, where you toasted with friends, family members and co. and then hit the dance floor. As invited As a person, you naturally feel honored to be among the chosen ones, and the anticipation increases from day to day. However, if you are already busy elsewhere and unable to postpone your plans, you are now faced with a rather unpleasant task: the transmission of the Cancellation. The closer you are to the bridal couple or just one of them, the more painful it is. There is a great fear of hurting the person because you cannot be there on his/her big day. So how do you best phrase and deliver this bad news without jeopardizing your relationship with the bride or groom?
Canceling the wedding invitation: These reasons can lead you to your decision
There are many reasons why you fail to attend a wedding. The cause is often obvious: You are already tied to another important appointment that you can no longer postpone. In this case your hands are simply tied and there is nothing you can do about it. On the other hand, maybe the bridal couple has decided to tie the knot abroad and you don’t have the financial resources to travel right now. In addition, it usually takes several days to stay when a wedding takes place in another country, since you usually don’t arrive and leave on the same day. You need so many vacation days for this – and not everyone has them so easily. This can also be a reason why you have to cancel a wedding invitation.
Of course, there’s also the possibility that you don’t feel like you’re close enough with the bride and groom that it would be appropriate for them to be present on their wedding day. Maybe you are just acquaintances or work colleagues and you don’t really know why you got an invitation. In this case, canceling is particularly tricky, not knowing whether it’s better to tell the truth or to be honest and admit that the wedding would make you feel out of place. Either way, canceling a wedding invitation requires a bit of finesse to avoid making a mistake.
Canceling a wedding invitation: You should definitely pay attention to this when you tell the bridal couple the bad news
No matter how you do it, the bride and groom will of course be disappointed that you have to cancel their invitation. However, if you pack it as comfortably and gently as possible, the pain is at least somewhat limited. You can find out here what you should definitely pay attention to in order to accommodate the couple.
Let me know in time
Point number one is really crucial: if the wedding invitation has a certain date by which the soon-to-be married need feedback from the guests, make sure to stick to it. There is an incredible amount of planning behind a wedding like this. In addition, each person costs the bridal couple money for food and Co. If the two know early enough, they can pass this on to their service providers and maybe save some money accordingly. It also gives them a better chance of anticipating that you won’t be around, although they will certainly appreciate that you broke the bad news to them as soon as possible.
Better deliver the message personally
Nobody likes to deliver bad news. If we can choose, we prefer to be told personally and accompanied by a hug or words that come from the heart. So if you are able to meet the bride and groom, it is better to cancel the wedding invitation if you see both of them in person. Getting that message quickly and casually via text message comes across as pretty half-hearted and indifferent — no matter how well you mean it. If you can phrase your rejection personally, it will come across as a lot more sincere, and the couple will get the impression that you care.
“Maybe” is not a response
Even if you mean well, there might still be a chance that you’ll make it to the wedding – don’t keep hesitating from “yes” to “no”. The two are just hanging in the balance, and they can’t do anything with a “maybe” anyway. Even if you want to keep the decision open, you are not doing the bride and groom any favors. Talk to them openly about the fact that you’re not sure right now if you’ll be able to be there. They may tell you that you can make a spontaneous decision, but they may also tell you that they need a final decision from you for their planning.
Better get it over with as soon as possible
Sending the cancellation as early as possible is not only an advantage for the bridal couple. For your own peace of mind, it’s better to get it over with as soon as possible. If you procrastinate, it will surely take a mental toll and keep you busy. And just because you haven’t said it yet doesn’t make it more comfortable – quite the opposite. The longer you wait, the more uncomfortable it will be for you and the couple.
Make a counter offer
Yes: If you don’t come to the wedding of the two, theoretically you don’t have to buy a gift either. But if you still think of something to alleviate the disappointment about your rejection and to congratulate them on their wedding, that is a great sign of appreciation. It doesn’t have to be incredibly expensive. Instead of a wedding present in the material sense, you can also invite the couple to dinner to toast with a glass of sparkling wine or wine. Give it some thought and show that you care that you can’t be there on their big day.